Up and down and up and down (with a stop at ER)

I'm getting real tired of these ups and downs. It's not I don't like excitement or surprises in my life (the jack-in-the-box thing is quite funny) but sometimes life seems to be pushing it a little too much. And not even two Ganeshas in one household seem to be able to do anything about it. Let me briefly recapitulate our Washington experience. It's quite hilarious. Since we came here, our dog got a parasitic infection and hives, my mom threw up like never before and my dad got a food poisoning. We went to Mt. Rainier and it was unbelievably gorgeous, we met some great friends and basically all the people we met since were so nice it would make a New-Jersian sick (luckily I am not one, I was just born there). Let me go faster now. The movers moved all our stuff for us and broke half of it. The dog ran away and came back. We met a lot of Czech people and most of them didn't even reply to our greeting. And last but not least, we found a great furniture store with a free on-site designer and amazing Indian and Chinese furniture. We got a baby-proofed ottoman (among other crap) and in 10 minutes after they delivered it, I managed to get my finger in. I ended up on a local ER and got 6 stitches. Again, the doctor was crazy nice and it was quite fun watching him sew my hand together. After the operation that made my dad green and my mom shaky, I got a stuffed zebra that's called "Bear" and got a lot of compliments for my walking. Whatever. The only thing that's really driving me nuts now is that I can't crawl. At least that's what my mom says all the time. But, again, on the UP side, it will go great with my dead-pirate Halloween costume tomorrow as I go dancing to a local strip club. I just hope chicks still dig that.

What's wrong with us?

I haven't written anything in a while but that isn't because nothing crazy, totally ridiculous, and unbelievably frakked-up has happened… it's more like 'cause so many crazy, totally ridiculous, and unbelievably frakked-up things did happen. First, our dog started pooping all over the apartment which resulted in my parents going crazy, dog trying to conceal it, and me not being able to crawl anymore anywhere. It sucked. Then she started to look all funny… her body was filled with huge blisters, her lip got so big she looked like a mean bulldog, and her neck had a gross ball under it. It was so ugly I thought we are taking her to the vet to put her down. But, she got some pills for it, allergy or whatever, and got a poop test for the poop. Well, it turned out she's full of tiny little parasites. So, even before my parents figured out how to get her to eat those two pills three times a day, she needed more pills. Yup, it was fun, kind-a gross, but fun.

Then, my parents took me to some Indian restaurant. Boy, am I glad I didn't eat that stuff. It smelled real nice and first, I was kind-a jealous but that went away real soon. Both mom and dad got really sick. I mean "really" sick. And dad was disabled even the next day, no matter how much I tried to get his mind off it by jumping on his stomach and trying to fit my Tylenol bottle into his nose.

I have just one small question and then I go. What is it here that makes my family so sick? My mom was throwing up like crazy, then the dog got blisters and parasites, and then both of my parents got poisoned. I mean, is it just karma compensating for everything that goes well in our lives or is Washington's air really so frakking clean in makes our New Jersian bodies collaps?!

And when's my turn?